You part and the blame game begins.
You may come back together.
Then the searching phase.
All the while you are learning about yourself, growing, loving yourself, going through those harsh lessons, then you get the ultimate prize, union with your Twin Flame.
Our higher selves, they are ahead of us, they help to guide us to union. Connection with your higher self will really help your growth.
There is no big mystery like they try to make out. It is however a better way of being, becoming the best possible version of yourself.
Yes the lessons hurt, but what life lesson does not, if it does not hurt, it could not be worth it.
The life of a Twin Flame is not easy but come on people let’s make it at least easy to understand!!
Twin Flame Chaser Surrender.
How to Stop Chasing:
- Acknowledge that chasing isn’t working. Whether you have been in this pattern 1 day or 1 month or 10 years. It isn’t working. If it was, you would have not only ‘caught’ your twin but be in relationship with him or her. This approach is almost never successful, except perhaps, on the school ground at recess in the distant or not too distant past.
- Stand Still. This person may be your twin. This connection may be real. It most likely is. But trying to force a relationship isn’t working. Understand that you have nothing to prove. In fact, the fact that the person you think is your twin is running does not mean this person is not your twin. But chasing won’t change his or her mind. It won’t give him or her an epiphany. Quite the opposite. It will just re-enforce his or her fear or aversion. So stop chasing. How? You stop this by respecting your twin’s boundaries. If he or she has told you it’s not happening. Listen to whatever reasons he or she provides. It could be any one of the following: He/she doesn’t feel the love or is in another relationship. Or your meeting has been a catalyst and has brought up too much all at once. It is often true that one person feels this connection more strongly. One twin can be triggered into fear, denial, and shutting down. One twin just may be more empathetic. Over time this can switch. But for right now, in my work, it is often the divine feminine.
- Understand that this is a connection first and foremost and not everyone is meant to come into relationship as part of his or her union. In my experience, as we grow and evolve how union is meant to show up is transforming. Some people have ‘been there done that’ and came here to have a working or mission based connection. Or to create a new kind of compromise or relationship that looks completely different and that can take time. It simply may not fit into our traditional love relationship framework that you may be looking for. Twins are here to redefine love and break down boundaries to it. This is a journey into unconditional love which is so enriching. But understand that there may not be a map for what that will look like and it may take flexibility and compromise. That doesn’t mean that it can’t evolve into something profound and meaningful. But your twin might not be as ready as you are to embrace it. So do NOT force it.
- Honor your twin’s truth. The twin flame connection is a journey that can be overwhelming. Sometimes it is just too much too soon. But if your twin has communicated he or she needs space and to not be in any relationship, then listen. There are all kinds of reasons why this might be the case. Sometimes one twin’s emotional body becomes saturated and he or she needs down time or periods away from the intensity a twin can stir up.
- Speak your truth. When you are in a state of balance, and this is key, share your truth with your twin. Listen to your intuition on how much information you provide, but trust that on a soul level your twin already knows everything you are sharing. However, know that if your twin is indeed a runner, this is rarely a game changer in the short term. But it does give you a sense of clarity and closure. And if you speak from a place of compassion and detachment, it can over time shed valuable light for a twin who is running. Being direct is so much better than using back channels. Be prepared to give him or her time to process. It unfolds so much more smoothly if you call on Archangel Gabriel, the angel of communication for assistance with this conversation.
- Move into a state of acceptance–which means you need to respect his or her boundaries without bitterness. Yes, I know that can be a tall order. But this period is a great time for you to work on you, on self love, on what your twin’s rejection brings up for you. It is also a fertile time to explore your own awakening and the gifts that emerge from this. If your twin has said no contact, or he or she needs a break. You need to give them that without undermining it. Trust that your twin is capable of growth and that you need to give him or her the benefits of his or her own learning. Otherwise, she or he may need to repeat the pattern to learn and benefit.
- Don’t attempt to manipulate the situation. Don’t assume that your twin is wrong. Don’t assume that you know better. Don’t work things behind the scenes through other players. The truth is that while you have the same soul signature, you are different people, often of different genders, with different ancestral histories and experiences for a reason. She or he may need a different process or to experience a relationship to help him or her heal. So look after you. Do your own energy healing work address your own shadow aspects. Do connect with other high level twins and twins who have already grown through this experience. When things are aligned to move forward, trust helpful people will show up. This is different then trying to influence the situation through back channels. Twins always feel this as undermining.
- Go deeper into your own self awareness. Understand that you are a trigger when you chase. Your twin is triggered by so many things, but a lack of control is one of them. Yes, control is an illusion and the journey is all about moving into divine surrender. But you need to give him or her his unique process. At the same time, embracing your own healing and spiritual growth impacts everything. You are a mirror for your twin in all ways. So if it is in your twin. Guess what? It is also in you. Find the opportunity to do your own healing. You are so often in parallel. If one twin is in a dark night of the soul, you may experience your own.
- Acknowledge the Runner In You. Right now you are stuck in chasing mode. But guess what? We typically have both within us and this relates to early childhood bonding wounds and whether we are anxious or avoidant bonders. Most likely there are triggers in your twin which could also cause you to run. So finding inner peace and moving into your own state of divine surrender is what it is all about. Inner child healing is so important for twins to resolve this state which stems from bonding wounds.
- Find detachment. This is work. This takes time. But finding this space, whether through mindfulness meditation, through spiritual practice, through energy healing, through prayer, through going deep into your own wounding from a place of self love is part of the reason you are both here. Twin flames are healers of the collective. They share an energy body that allows them to hold copious amounts of light. But calling your own power back and doing what you can to not enter a state of co-energy dependency is so helpful.
- Don’t reject the connection. So many twins react to the rejection of the runner by becoming runners themselves. They attempt to radically rip apart from the twin and as you share a third energy, this is so detrimental. So be careful not to descend to the level of your twin. This perpetuates the self loathing and nothing fertile grows from this state. Can you find the love and compassion for what your twin may be going through? Can you hold yourself in that love and compassion as well?
- Be Kind To Yourself. The twin connection is such a new experience. More and more twins are being born together on the earth as we enter the third wave of ascension. But in previous years this was quite rare. The twin connection can throw you on an accelerated path of awakening of soul searching and a dark night. You have done nothing wrong. When you know better, do better.
- Be open to the possibilities. Twins are instant manifestors. When and IF your twin is ready to connect, it will happen as long as you are not shut down in a state of resentment or wounding. Being vulnerable, allowing yourself to feel is why we are here. There is so much angelic and spiritual support. I see in my practice that twins are surrounded in love.
- Call in the love right now. Sometimes we think we only want love from our twin. But, really? Love is great. Call it in, clear the blocks from receiving it into your life and knowing you are worthy. Guess what? This boosts your vibration. Guess what? This helps you heal, move forward, and feel so much better. Guess what? This makes you fall in love with you and other people take that lead.
- Embrace your twin flame mission. You are here for a divine life purpose. You are here to shine. You can work on your twin flame mission solo. Embracing your mission by taking small aligned steps and by taking risks to go bigger, lights up your energy, and makes you more magnetic to joy, to abundance, and to your twin. When you take steps on your mission, you are no longer chasing your twin you are moving forward in divine alignment. You are not running or chasing. You are flowing with the universe and this is the state of twin flame union, this is the divine flow. And, ultimately, this connects us all within it.
Twin Flame Runner & Chaser
It is so intense that often one of them may run from the relationship — this is what is commonly known as the runner/chaser stage. There may be difficulty in being together for long periods of time. Twin flames connect even at a distance as telepathy and empathy are common between them.
The runner experiences soul shock as well but in a very different way than the chaser does. For the chaser, this is a highly emotional time. Anger and confusion reign as you see your Twin Flame burn your shared destiny and spiritual journey, seemingly without a thought your way.
Runners love it when chasers keep up with the chase. This chase also triggers their healing during the Twin Flame process. It is very confusing when your Twin Flame runs from you. You also feel frustrated and exhausted from chasing him or her.
The changes in the energetic flow between the runner and the chaser; Twin Flames share the same energy vibration, and therefore you can feel the growth in your Twin Flame’s energetic frequency.
There is also a feeling of inner freedom that you feel. You stop feeling stressed out by the chasing behaviors of your partner.
A Twin Flame always comes back to you. You have to believe that a Reunion with your Twin Flame is imminent.
When the Twin Flame Chaser withdraws their energy to focus on themselves through SURRENDER, the chaser Twin Flame gets exhausted from controlling the relationship, the runner gets room to contemplate about what was happening.
Once the pressure from the chaser is gone, the runner misses the chase because they are not running anymore since nothing is chasing them.
The runner Twin Flame panics because they realize that Chaser was serious and genuine after all. They start to wonder if the chaser is going to forget about them and move on which brings more longing for their Twin Flame.
This is part of the Soul lessons for the Runner Twin Flame. Every experience is an opportunity to grow the Soul.
If the runner was trying to replace the feelings of being connected to their Twin Flame with other things or people, they realize how exhausting it is to try and forge that authentic connection.
The overwhelming dynamic in any twin flame relationship is the dynamic of the runner and the chaser. Before a relationship can truly take hold, one of the pair usually opts out of the intense relationship and flees. They literally run. When they do, the heartbroken stayer must make do as best they can with their broken heart. In time, the stayer begins to question what really went on. Why did he/she run? Was it something they did or said? This article sheds light on the twin flame runner's perspective.
Why Do Twin Flames Run?
We have to understand firstly that twins are often at completely different levels of understanding. One twin is usually known as the 'self aware' one, whilst the other is blindly living in the dark, being much less aware and together. Whilst they may be together in a worldly sense, spiritually speaking they may be living unconsciously day by day, not aware of their own motivations and driven simply by feeling.
When they run, they usually just take off, not even knowing why, perhaps not even caring why. For them to analyse their own actions may be altogether unfamiliar. They can be creatures of instinct more than conscious reasoning, and this is truly painful for the twin flame 'stayer', the one who doesn't run.
Overwhelming Feelings, The Runner's Perspective
As we get down to the nitty gritty, we realise that they run, not because they don't love us, but because they DO. Yes, it is one of those ironies of life that are ever so inconvenient. The more they love us - remembering this is a new and unaccustomed love - the more they have to get away from us. Being on the receiving end of this myself, I know how it feels. At the time, the stayer is devastated! Then as the years roll on, they can come to understand what may have happened and why.
The Soul SHOCK Of Twin Flame Relationships
There is something known as soul shock when we meet our exact mirror soul mate, our twin flame. They are the other half of who we are. They are our eternal spiritual partner, they are us.
When we finally meet this person, the connection is often obsessive and uncanny for both. It shocks us to our very soul. Right now many people are meeting their twin flames, whom they haven't seen in physical incarnation for a long time. The more conscious twin will be just as shocked as the runner twin, but perhaps better able to deal with it. The stayer twin will analyse the situation and face it head on. They are willing to give anything a go, willing to risk it all. They only want more of their twin, and will face the fear willingly.
Not so the runner. We have to try to understand things from the runner's perspective. They are not trying to hurt us, not usually anyway (some twins can be emotionally damaged, and may be accustomed to making love into a battle field). Usually they run out of blind fear. Do they know why they run? I don't believe many of them truly do. They are faced with change, and so they react the only way they can, to run.
Afraid Of Change And Waking Up
Not all of us wake up spiritually at the same time, in fact it would be strange if all twin flames were in exactly the same place when they met each other. One twin is always a little ahead of the other. I believe the one that is ahead is a catalyst of great change for the behind one, if they dare to take the challenge and stay. The fact that most, if not all, run is a testament to how scary that challenge truly is.